One of our Pastors was speaking of the timelessness of Jesus, how He is as ageless and timeless as God, Himself.
The Trinity, The Father, Son and Holy Spirit, having no beginning or end, existing in every moment of time, concurrently...
That does tend to get this old rusted cerebellum rotating.
I like to ponder the unknowable. I don't know why, just an odd and perplexing hobby or habit I have. I just have to try " figuring it out"...
In perusing this line of thought, something hit me like a baseball bat. Not one of those nice, cushy foam ones or a slender, yellow Whiffle Ball bat, but a solid oak, lead weighted home run bat; the kind of bat that will not meekly bounce off its target, but rather pounds straight thru it...
My head and my heart melded together in a horrific realization.
I saw Jesus, eternally crucified, eternally beaten, eternally suffering our Punishments, for sins He did not commit...
When my Pastor coined the phrase " everywhen", to describe Jesus's perpetual existence thruout time, I don't think this was where he was heading...
But my crazy neural pathways go where Angels fear to tread...
Silly neurons...
So, if Jesus is simultaneously existing in all moments, past, present and future, then He must be in each of those seconds of time, eternally..
An eternity before Adam, before The Fall, before sin existed, an ever present Christ would have been hanging on a cross for what Adam and the rest of us, would ultimately do..
Long after The Rapture, after both Heaven and Hell have claimed their eternal residents, He would still be hanging upon that cross...
Just as He will always be crushing The Serpent, always be swaddled in a makeshift crib in the manger and always be healing a leper...
Always be arising from the tomb, in defeat of sin and death...
I don't know about you, but the idea of this really troubles me...
That He loved us enough to suffer and die a substitutionary death for us was a difficult concept. The idea that He could love us each enough to do this even once, was hard to grasp...
But that He would do it in continuum, kind of shatters my mind...
Breaks my heart ...
It took years, almost a lifetime, to trade this guilt for Grace, believing that Jesus died only once for me. How can I process this? That at the same moment He is Ruler over all dominions, He is dying for my sin...
....forever?
Talk about Grace...
This is why re-runs of Gilligans Island are the kind of mind fodder that suits me best.
Theological wanderings hurt my head.
Theological wanderings tend to bruise my heart...
Stuff like this seriously breaks me. Realizing that there is no possible way I can ever conceive how precious I am, and that we all are, to our Lord, our God...
That the Guilt I feel for His Sacrafice was included on the Cross...
That just like His Perfect Grace,understanding His inconceivable Love, I must also, take on Faith...
Admit that it is beyond my scope and surpasses my simple ken...
and realize that I do not need to understand it all, in its entirety...
...just accept my Salvation, thru Him.
And stop thinking...
Mostly, just stop thinking...
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